On our long trips to Georgia, we children would try to create out own Burma Shave rhymes. Ours were similar to THIS IS NOT/A CLEVER VERSE/I TRIED/AND TRIED/ BUT JUST/GOT WORSE.

None of ours survived to my knowledge, but the company thought the public could participate: AS YOU DRIVE/PLAY THIS GAME/CONSTRUCT/A JINGLE/WITH THIS NAME/BURMA SHAVE.

To get new rhymes, contests were held and produced thousands of submissions. Some of the older T&D readers may have participated. The jingles chosen were in total a remarkable potpourri of folk humor, wit and skillfully offbeat merchandising. NO LADY LIKES/TO DANCE/OR DINE/ACCOMPANIED BY/A PORCUPINE and HE ASKED/HIS KITTEN/TO PET AND PURR/SHE EYED HIS PUSS/AND SCREAMED/“WHAT FUR!”

Boy/girl or romantic themes were used. IF CRUSOE’D/KEPT HIS CHIN/MORE TIDY/HE MIGHT HAVE FOUND/A LADY FRIDAY or IN CUPID’S LITTLE/BAG OF TRIX/ HERE’S THE ONE/THAT CLIX/ WITH CHIX.

Puns and wordplay were popular: HER CHARIOT/RACED AT 80 PER/THEY HAULED AWAY/WHAT HAD/BEN HUR and HE SAW/THE TRAIN/AND TRIED TO DUCK IT/KICKED FIRST THE GAS/AND THEN THE BUCKET.

During war times, patriotic themes were popular: MAYBE YOU CAN’T/SHOULDER A GUN/BUT YOU CAN SHOULDER/THE COST OF ONE/BUY DEFENSE BONDS and TESTED/IN PEACE/PROVEN IN WAR/ BETTER NOW/THAN EVER BEFORE.

Public safety themes were used also: DON’T LOSE/YOUR HEAD/TO GAIN A MINUTE/YOU NEED YOUR HEAD/YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT and MANY A FOREST/USED TO STAND/WHERE A/LIGHTED MATCH/ GOT OUT OF HAND.

The ubiquitous rival, Barbasol, seemed to be getting the upper hand, so THIS CREAM/IS LIKE/A PARACHUTE/THERE ISN’T/ANY SUBSTITUTE and SUBSTITUTES/CAN LET YOU DOWN/ QUICKER/THAN A/STRAPLESS GOWN.

Alas, increased speed because of wider roads and improved cars in the late 1940s and the 1950s led to less time to read and comprehend the signs. Also television viewing became more pervasive, those commercials reaching more people. Air travel became more popular: ‘TWOULD BE/ MORE FUN/TO GO BY AIR/IF WE COULD PUT/THESE SIGNS UP THERE.

By the time the roadside signs advertising campaign of Burma Shave was phased out in the 1960s, 35,000 signs had been placed in all contiguous states, along rural U.S. highways and on major thoroughfares into and out of cities and towns. More than a quarter-century later, we swish down superhighways so fast we can only see multi-story billboards, and entertainment within the travelers’ vehicles is the electronic kind. Oh, for the slower pace of the “good ole days.”

My source for these verses is a book by Frank Rowsome Jr., “The Verse By the Side of the Road,” Stephen Greene Press, Brattleboro, Vermont, c. 1965. He ends his book with FAREWELL, O VERSE/ALONG THE ROAD/HOW SAD TO/ KNOW YOU’RE/OUT OF MODE/BURMA SHAVE.

T&D Correspondent Iris Arant-Kittrell, EdD, is a retired educator.

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