SANTEE - It's no secret; there are some key issues that parents find hard to discuss with their children.
Likewise, children aren't often the first ones to initiate heart-to-heart discussions with their parents.
Sometimes, it takes a local community leader or expert to create an opportunity for parents to open up to their children and children to communicate with their parents.
At the second annual Family and Community Conference sponsored in part by Orangeburg Consolidated School District Three, the Office of Safe and Drug-Free Schools and other key agencies, community leaders and experts moderated opportunities to air often the "difficult to discuss" topics.
More than 200 people, including presenters and participants, attended the event Saturday, Jan. 10 at Lake Marion High School in Santee. The focus of Saturday's discussions was on the conference's central theme: "Why We Can't Wait - Strengthening Families, Schools and Communities." Topics ranging from the consequences of gang violence to abstinence and character education to common issues faced by parents were addressed. The bulk of the discussions took place in break-out sessions.
In one area, parents discussed a variety of topics including parenting skills and family values with facilitators. In other classrooms, students split into groups organized by grade level. There, students tackled some big topics head on, including gang violence, goal setting, character education and sexually transmitted diseases.
Students in grades pre-kindergarten through fourth grade discussed fire safety, participated in health and wellness activities and engaged in reading exercises.
First-time conference participant Cynthia James, a parent from Holly Hill, said the discussions are helpful to the community and to individuals.
"It helps us become better citizens for our children. It helps motivate us," she said.
Similarly, parent Gwendolyn Page of Holly Hill said the conference provided opportunities for her to learn about education options - especially pertaining to children who face behavior and academic challenges. Page said she also learned of financial assistance available to help parents fund their children's' college education.
Most of Saturday's discussions, however, focused on students.
In a break-out session on character education, Holly Hill Elementary School counselor and entrepreneur Joseph Brown talked with high school students about "moving from mediocrity to marvelous." He engaged students in dialogue and expounded on three reasons why students may be "mediocre" in their general contributions to society, whether academically or otherwise. Brown told the students that many of them had "low to no interest in school," exhibited laziness and a lack of manners. He, however, challenged them to "turn those mediocre things around and become marvelous."
Brown, a 22-year education veteran, then rallied the students to have a new appreciation for school, stop being lazy and to not be stingy in displaying good manners.
In another classroom break-out discussion, students talked candidly about the consequences of gang involvement and gang violence.
With over two decades of experience in law enforcement, Sgt. James Green of the Orangeburg County Sheriff's Office has just about seen it all. He said he promised God he would work to educate teens and young people about the dangers of gang involvement.
"Someone's trying to save you from that lonesome graveyard and that cold prison cell," Green told a group of high school sophomores and juniors.
"Gang banging and drug dealing - they're not going to get you anywhere⦠you are the future that is coming up. Take pride in what you do," he said.
The conference also featured a frank discussion about sexual abstinence. For the "ladies only" discussion about sex, moderators Karen Clinton and Tiffany Stewart of USC-Claflin's Export organization (which focuses on HIV, AIDS and HPV awareness) spearheaded the dialogue, joined by Pat Kelly of a Family Affair (an HIV/AIDS support group) and Yolanda Jamison, a health educator with the S.C. Department of Health.
Clinton said it isn't unusual that the only advice mothers give their daughters about sex is to "keep their legs crossed and their dresses down." But she said parents need to engage in open and honest discussions with their children about sex. She said 90 percent of children have heard about sex by the time they reach third grade.
Clinton and other moderators advised parents to seek professional assistance if they need help talking to their children about sex.
Several conference speakers will also be on hand at a Youth Gang Awareness Concert at the Lake Marion High School auditorium at 5 p.m. on Saturday, March 7.
The concert will feature Columbia-area comedian Akintunde and recording artist Canton Jones of Atlanta. Tickets are $15 in advance and $20 at the door.
T&D Correspondent Martha Rose Brown can be reached by e-mail at marfawose@aol.com. Discuss this and other stories online at TheTandD.com.